Get Well Soon


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Hopeless, self-destructive, desperate behavior repeated daily for years, decades, well, the prognosis is always going to appear beyond poor – he/she will fail . I’ve heard it, I’ve whispered that back to the angel who dangled from my shoulder, rope fraying while the devil made the trip over with a knife to hasten the fall.

No doubt he fell, but it’s exactly why angels have wings. There are inevitable collapses, breaches of trust that split into continental divides. Words can’t become tectonic, but a little work can move some rocks from here to there. People can change; I know this, because I am different. Various kudos I have gotten from therapists, counselors, and souls temporarily in contact with mine at the time:

You’ll be dead by 30.
You’ll never stop using if you don’t quit now.
You’re a lost cause Michael.
You’ve wasted so much talent, so much ability for heroin.
You love drugs more than me. You threw it all away.
Michael, you’re dead to me, and you will be soon enough to the world.

Yet, here I am. Flying home in 3 days. To see family and friends. To give back, attempt to make things right. I am vigilant in my gratitude, it keeps me grounded, it reminds me to be selfless.

So never give up hope if you love one of us. If you are me, I can’t stop the descent. I can tell you though there’s no reason to keep digging any deeper. I pray you understand. Fix yourself by climbing out of that hole, and I promise you there will be a lot of people who will help get you back on your feet. It just has to be that way.

Peace, love and enlightenment to all,
MFJ

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