I am present and accounted for, can’t really say the same for her. A lot of corner boy news barking, looking for an ear to hear. Headlines of shock dwarfed by a dream I can put my effort into, and make it all come true. Have to wonder how a failure’s success sits on her mind. Will it be happiness for me, or regret for her?
There has been so many lost nights, my brain on autopilot, crashing into jealousy mountain. I should be a better man, should move past Go! and collect my $200. Just need to deplane, find the right connecting flight and soar. Packed intentions too big to carry on, so it’s checked baggage, that I hope can follow my undetermined itinerary. Then again, maybe naked is the way to go, so those closest can truly see the real me.
Speaking in riddles, again, camouflaged interpretations give me some sort of deniability if it all goes astray. The tip of the iceberg, the magnitude of a secret below the surface. Completely off-topic, there is no more depressing feeling than buying a ‘sugar-free’ item by mistake. This is the case with my Jell-o pudding…Bill Cosby would be pissed they even went this direction. That nasty aftertaste is killing me. It’s dessert, I want the calories, I want the sugar. Evil mother…Seriously, who eats stuff without calories, what’s the point?
But yeah, where was I? Oh yeah, masked intentions. Being ‘that guy’ for a higher cause, it all works out in the end, I have been that broken body walked on, and survived. Might feel good doing the stepping, a change of pace, judging who is deserving. What would you do? What would you say? Status quo Neanderthal, I sit back and wait. Last thing I need is always what I end up getting, so, maybe I should look into the sun for my clarity. Artificial dreamer, stubbed toes and sometimes crawling is the fastest way.
Inside, this is how I swim, against all the currents, burning out to catch a spark. Jesus Mike, are you doing ok? Never better, because it is all overexposure without really being able to chip away at the truth. The nights blend and the days stagnate, can’t really tell me which way is up and what time I should live. By the way, where did yesterday go? Take a number, I will get to it when I find the time, because I am such a fanatical dreamer these days. See it and it will be. Focus…
Tick-tock, springtime deepens the cesspool. Too much rain is coming down, and I can’t find the right gear. My dog is covered, if you follow this mess regularly. My face isn’t aging, but my eyes give away where I have been. Modern day Methuselah, might just have a right to be a little fatigued. Package up my sins into something beautiful, to make a more perfect today, and I know that pisses so many off. Portrayals might not be as kind as they recall, and the truth has a way of pissing liars off. My apologies.
PS, the Black Keys are not new, they have been around since 2001. Yes, I am talking to you. I really can’t stomach this pudding. Helicopter circles, searchlight in dusk’s fading rays, won’t find me here. Won’t find me anywhere, because you only know where I have been, and don’t want to see where I am headed. You can always call me, just nothing to say to allow a trace.
No, I am not schizophrenic, much to many’s dismay. It’s just there’s a lot going on these days, and my excitement shoves my thoughts in a lot of directions, and it spills here. Nothing is easy, and there really isn’t a code to decipher my perceived madness. It’s going to all be peachy. Think I overdosed on Tony Robbins, without ever seeing him beyond 20 seconds on some sleepless night. Unless it was subliminal and heard as I slept.
And what’s with Dr. Phil? And Dr. Drew? Another day, another dollar from the screwed up, just looking for a hand or maybe a hand out to get the next fix. Such a bitter boy…Or a redeemed soul, and the prophet understands the turmoil breeds peace. I will see everyone on the other side of tomorrow.
“Choices are the hinges of destiny” ~ Pythagoras